| Author |
An Appology to All |
BackSlash
Marshal
Galactic Navy
Joined: March 23, 2003
Posts: 11183
From: Bristol, England
|  Posted: 2005-02-23 19:14
Well first of all, this is more than one appology, more like several, at first I was going to make seperate and give them to the apropriate people, but it makes sense to just put it in one so that for the relivant people (quite a few) its right here for them.
This post, is ofcourse, about my behaviour over the past few months (pretty much since the new year started). I have come to annoy/upset/anger many people including myself, and I hope to appologise properly over the next few paragraphs/pages depending on how this turns out.
The first appology goes to the staff, who have more than put up with me for the past few months, and if im being honest, I dont know why im still allowed to login. They must either be blind, or just crazy. Either way im greatful to be able to still post and play here. I have most probably caused a lot of paperwork behind secret room of which we all know as the PSD, for which I appologise.
The second appology goes to, well anyone who has pretty much been witness to my outbreaks. Which must be over half the regular playerbase (if not more). As an older player of the community (relativly), I should of known better, and for any new players that had to witness it, I appologise, one should not have to see those things in a lobby, and it sets a bad example (which I had no intention of ever doing). I will especialy appologise to a select few, who I had no intention of upseting or arguing with, but I did, and I cannot turn back the clock (wish I could). I intend to speak to the people in private and appologise to those few after this if they will let me.
Third, I will appologise to myself, because I know im better than this, and I know I dont usualy act like this, and in a way im angry at myself for letting something like this get to a stage where it effects everyone around me.
You may be wondering, "what in the hell is he doing, its just a game"...To me its much more than a game, and its been more than a game for a few years for me. I log in everyday, not to see who reigns supreme in the MV, or who's been using flux more than so and so, I log in to speak to my friends, or whats left of them. I appologise to my friends, who have most probably had the brunt of my "/send f" rage, that I appologise for, no one should have to login to see lines of "!£&U!£%¬&!£$^£!". Those of which who have put up with that, I thank you, and I hope I may still call you friends.
In the first few weeks of January I had some bad news conserning a friend I am very close with (more than close you could say). I have known her for a very long time and I hadnt taken some bad news too well, at this point I had started to lose sleep to the point were I was getting at most, about 5 hours of sleep a night. Now I could have quiet possibly crawled my way back out by the end of January without any of these problems occuring or taking place. But they did, the reason being I had some very bad news about a family member who I have been very close too all my life (I dont want to go into details). Towards the end of January up untill now I have been getting on average, 3-4 hours of sleep a night (it didnt seem that bad at the time). I'd just login to whatever and try to lose myself in whatever way I could. Edventualy it became a endless loop of anger because I was tired, and not being able to sleep because of these problems, and being angry at the problems.
I know I shouldnt have continued like that, and anyone who has been in that sort of situation will know that it is extremely hard to break the loop. Anyway, lastnight whist talking to a friend, I told them why I had been acting out of character, those who know me well, know that I dont just crumble on the slightest word or action, sometimes I may say a word or two, but not full blown arguements, taken further than needs be.
I've taken steps to rectify my behaviour, and I hope everyone can forgive the way I've been acting the past months.
Im hoping to take a few weeks off DarkSpace, just reduced the time I play and login untill my anger has improved.
Sorry
-Jack aka BackSlash
[ This Message was edited by: BackSlash *Jack* on 2005-02-23 19:19 ]
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$milingJ35te|2™{=21st=}[R33HG]
Fleet Admiral
Joined: September 10, 2002
Posts: 310
From: smilingjester
| Posted: 2005-02-23 19:31
*Salute*
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-RevenG-
Raven Warriors
Joined: March 03, 2004
Posts: 2673
| Posted: 2005-02-23 19:36
You always got a friend in me Jack.
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Ragglock
Marshal
BIOnics Industry Syndicate
Joined: May 29, 2001
Posts: 1955
From: Denmark
| Posted: 2005-02-23 19:51
good move
been there done that
do what i do smash 10 dreds or stations when you get the urge to explode 
i had to mend my ways to belive me.
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P:@12 C:$38
LOVE the smell of human flesh in the morning smells like MVictory
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Enterprise
Chief Marshal
Joined: May 19, 2002
Posts: 2576
From: Hawthorne, Nevada
| Posted: 2005-02-23 20:50
Holy god.
*cough*Apology accepted*coughcough,sputterwheeze...*
Sorry what was this about again?
-Ent
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.spaivxx.
Grand Admiral
Joined: November 10, 2002
Posts: 381
| Posted: 2005-02-23 21:21
I am lucky having not really witnessed any of these outbursts of yours.  I know first hand the 3-4 hours of sleep feeling, I was stuck on that rut for years . It aint healthy, I'll say that.
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Coeus {NCX-Charger}
Admiral, I can't read,
Sundered Weimeriners
Joined: February 16, 2004
Posts: 3635
From: South Philly
| Posted: 2005-02-23 22:36
*nod*
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Darkspace: Twilight
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Jaydawg
Vice Admiral
Joined: October 11, 2003
Posts: 150
From: vermilion AB
| Posted: 2005-02-23 23:19
Pretend your A cat, And you'll sleep like never before!
P.S. : Thanks for helping me with my internet tweaking the other day!
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KanaDIEn ^_^
Marshal
Galactic Navy
Joined: March 20, 2004
Posts: 294
| Posted: 2005-02-23 23:58
apology noted
(potty mouth)
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Steamrunner
Cadet
Joined: January 15, 2005
Posts: 74
From: Somewhere in California
| Posted: 2005-02-24 00:49
Well, you didn't say anything emotionally charged and leaking anger to me, but I would have took it, and then told you what you told us just now. *GRIN*
You are a great sort Backy, and I would never forgive you if you left. Or died. Or started up again...
*HUG*
You get to be the DJ B!tch Of Next Month perhaps...
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Archon
Grand Admiral
Joined: October 14, 2003
Posts: 331
From: Queensland, Australia
| Posted: 2005-02-24 01:07
Like they say, people make mistakes.
Anyway, Accepted.
Archon
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~Insanity Is Only The Beginning~
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Placebo
Vice Admiral
Joined: September 16, 2003
Posts: 450
| Posted: 2005-02-24 08:50
It's cool mate, everyone has their days. Just sort yourself out and stay happy.
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Abandoned Mind
Fleet Admiral
Joined: December 08, 2002
Posts: 130
From: Brattleboro, Vermont
| Posted: 2005-02-24 08:56
I have not taken any offense, so an apology is not required for me.
This is a courageous post, good man.
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James Bum007
Grand Admiral
Pitch Black
Joined: April 23, 2003
Posts: 480
From: Queens, New York
| Posted: 2005-02-24 09:02
Well done Jack, take care of yourself and see you soon.
James
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lightning[Voyager][ A ]
Cadet
Joined: August 04, 2004
Posts: 419
From: CANADA. QUEBEC
| Posted: 2005-02-24 15:02
im with you man, ppl makes mistake and the first step is to accept it and talk about I salut you, good luck
[small][ This Message was edited by: lightning[Voyager][ 1ra ] on 2005-02-24 15:04 ][/small]
[ This Message was edited by: lightning[Voyager][ 1ra ] on 2005-02-24 17:43 ]
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