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Since there seems to be some confusion... |
kenetiks
Admiral
Galactic Navy
Joined: November 21, 2001
Posts: 1130
From: Bandcamp
|  Posted: 2007-12-15 20:52
Since my long, proud and outstanding heritage has been called into question. It has been suggested that since I do not have an official "Redneck Life Story" thread, that my true genetic disposition WILL NOT be officially recognized by the staff.
I submit to you, shiggyrandermuffinpoo, that I, Sir kenetiks, the founding father of Dark Space Redneckism, am truly THE REDNECK. And extreme proof that Darwin was, of course, right and furthermore that consecutive generational inbreeding is bad for collective gene-pool.
First of course, my mother and father went on a date and fell madly in love...
Ah my first pet, we shared a unique bond. Man and beast as it were.
Although I was surely discontent as a child...
My early teenage years were a lot better.
During my late teenage years, my excellent skills at sports showed that I indeed was clearly a breed unto myself...
Of course my redneck heritage was always evident in everything I did.
I soon became a young man and in need of cash for my seemingly endless thirst for beer and marlboros, worked a myriad of jobs.
Fork Lift Driver...
Ballast Tank Engineer...
Dock Crane Operator...
And even a bomb removal technician,(my co-workers adored my hardy sense of humor)
Although my southern redneck roots allowed me to achieve almost legendary status at any career I chose, I felt that none of those jobs really befitted a person of my supreme skills. So off I went in great soul search. To find out who I truly was...
Through my years searching I became a daring thrill seeker of the master redneck race...
Always dressed in my traditional clothes of my ancestors, I lived the fast life in style...
Slept were I wanted...
And even had a small run in with law enforcement....
That is when I found my calling, that ultimate lifelong commitment that truly befit both my heritage and roots as a modern redneck....
Truck driver extraodinaire!
Tha End.
Edit:typos
[ This Message was edited by: kenetiks on 2007-12-15 20:56 ]
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Leonide
Grand Admiral
Templar Knights
Joined: October 01, 2005
Posts: 1553
From: Newport News, Virginia
| Posted: 2007-12-15 21:30
rofl!
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Lacrosseian
Fleet Admiral
Raven Warriors
Joined: October 01, 2004
Posts: 1254
| Posted: 2007-12-15 21:33
If you were a true redneck, then you would not have to create your own thread to tell the tell. Your redneckness would be obvious tot he extent that another member of the community would be able to tell your story without any need of inside information.
No, my friend you are not a true redneck. Your story could have been created by your own imagination in a plot to prove that you are a true redneck. Unfortunately, you over did it and it is now more obvious than ever that you are in fact NOT a redneck.
-Lacro
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kenetiks
Admiral
Galactic Navy
Joined: November 21, 2001
Posts: 1130
From: Bandcamp
| Posted: 2007-12-15 21:51
Quote:
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On 2007-12-15 21:33, Lacro wrote:
If you were a true redneck, then you would not have to create your own thread to tell the tell. Your redneckness would be obvious tot he extent that another member of the community would be able to tell your story without any need of inside information.
No, my friend you are not a true redneck. Your story could have been created by your own imagination in a plot to prove that you are a true redneck. Unfortunately, you over did it and it is now more obvious than ever that you are in fact NOT a redneck.
-Lacro
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I beg to differ sir Lacro.
If you would kindly turn your attention to google and type in the words "kenetiks" and "redneck" in the search box and depress the "Google Search" button, The Great Oracle of the Internet would immediately show you that, I am indeed the redneck of lore.
Besides, shig made me do it...
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Lacrosseian
Fleet Admiral
Raven Warriors
Joined: October 01, 2004
Posts: 1254
| Posted: 2007-12-15 22:13
And I made Shig do it...
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Doran
Chief Marshal
Galactic Navy
Joined: March 29, 2003
Posts: 4032
From: The Gideon Unit
| Posted: 2007-12-15 22:44
i also made shig do it.
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GothThug {C?}
Fleet Admiral
Joined: June 29, 2005
Posts: 2932
| Posted: 2007-12-16 01:31
um wow....and i truely thought feral was teh true Redneck XD
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Fatal Rocko Willis
Fleet Admiral
Fatal Squadron
Joined: March 01, 2003
Posts: 1336
From: Kentucky
| Posted: 2007-12-16 08:39
You should be more careful Ken... that first picture may be offensive to some of the women around here (not mentioning any names but you know who you are)...
Oh and by the way.. you are not the only redneck here ...
God Bless Rednecks, God Bless America and God Bless Freedom Of Speech...
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Coeus
Grand Admiral
Sundered Weimeriners
Joined: March 22, 2006
Posts: 2815
From: Philly
| Posted: 2007-12-16 12:45
Of course God blesses rednecks, how the hell else would Darwin have been proven soo very very VERY wrong? 
<3 u guyz 
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ICC Security Council Chief Enforcer
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doda *EP5 no longer exception...*
Grand Admiral
Joined: December 11, 2005
Posts: 1012
From: happy land
| Posted: 2007-12-16 19:24
rolf pretty funny
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kenetiks
Admiral
Galactic Navy
Joined: November 21, 2001
Posts: 1130
From: Bandcamp
| Posted: 2007-12-16 19:49
Quote:
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On 2007-12-16 12:45, Coeus wrote:
Of course God blesses rednecks, how the hell else would Darwin have been proven soo very very VERY wrong?
<3 u guyz
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muh homie
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kenetiks
Admiral
Galactic Navy
Joined: November 21, 2001
Posts: 1130
From: Bandcamp
| Posted: 2007-12-16 19:52
Quote:
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On 2007-12-16 08:39, Rocko Willis wrote:
You should be more careful Ken... that first picture may be offensive to some of the women around here (not mentioning any names but you know who you are)...
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It was actually not meant to be vulger/offensive only edgy humor.
Quote:
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Oh and by the way.. you are not the only redneck here ...
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Yes, we all know Coeus is a closet redneck of the northern hemisphere.
Quote:
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God Bless Rednecks, God Bless America and God Bless Freedom Of Speech...
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Hooah!
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Little Pet Slinki
Admiral
Joined: April 16, 2006
Posts: 836
From: United Kingdom, South West.
| Posted: 2007-12-16 20:10
tl;dr
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Coeus
Grand Admiral
Sundered Weimeriners
Joined: March 22, 2006
Posts: 2815
From: Philly
| Posted: 2007-12-16 20:26
...
a northern redneck
Isnt' that an oxymoron?
Thats like an Alabama Yankee.
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Do I really look like a guy with a plan?
'I'm gonna go crazy, and I'm taking you with me!'
ICC Security Council Chief Enforcer
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kenetiks
Admiral
Galactic Navy
Joined: November 21, 2001
Posts: 1130
From: Bandcamp
| Posted: 2007-12-16 20:30
Somewhat I suppose, maybe the mirror of a redneck for the north?
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