| Author |
Fattierob's Polyonymous neverending fiction (Last part added) |
Sven
Cadet
Sundered Weimeriners
Joined: January 11, 2003
Posts: 278
From: Vancouver, Canada
|  Posted: 2003-08-20 19:50
keep it comin! this is funny!
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Sven Viking: Dynamiting himself to pieces since 5/30/2003!
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Depthcharge
Fleet Admiral
Galactic Navy
Joined: December 08, 2002
Posts: 1549
From: DFW, Tx
| Posted: 2003-08-20 19:54
Heh.
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History Is Written By The Victors
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Quistis {C?}
Cadet
Evil Empires Inc.
Joined: April 06, 2002
Posts: 1536
| Posted: 2003-08-20 21:53
I think i musta missed a page...
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Sven
Cadet
Sundered Weimeriners
Joined: January 11, 2003
Posts: 278
From: Vancouver, Canada
| Posted: 2003-08-23 17:40
more..... must... have MoRe!
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Sven Viking: Dynamiting himself to pieces since 5/30/2003!
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Rhamadahn Dave
Cadet
Joined: July 15, 2002
Posts: 20
From: portage county,Ohio
| Posted: 2003-08-23 23:36
lol nicely done u should DARK SPACE: THE PHANTOM NEWBIES or somthing like that.
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Ragglock
Marshal
BIOnics Industry Syndicate
Joined: May 29, 2001
Posts: 1955
From: Denmark
| Posted: 2003-08-24 01:31
probaly have to wait 10 years to read that one 
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TheBumble
Cadet
Joined: June 24, 2002
Posts: 962
From: PALESTAR
| Posted: 2003-08-24 09:38
superb - just suberb
many thanks for a great laugh - go on
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Fattierob
Vice Admiral
Joined: April 25, 2003
Posts: 4059
| Posted: 2003-08-25 00:05
DARK SPACE
EMPIRE STRIKES BACK
Episode 1.482
part 4,
Part 3 of Part 4
(editors note: The only reason why this is coming out so early is because of (=SSC=)Sven the Angry Viking ®© ...so remember to thank him sometime...However, this is short and not as funny as usual. sven stop bothering me, it's down when it's down )
*cue a few measures of Into The Trap*
(Scence: inside of Battle dread, the Miliniuem bird)
Depthcharge is in the pilot seat. His alien copilot, Josef, takes
some getting used to in the familiar enviroments of the Battle Dreadnoughts's
cockpit. Depth speaks into his comlink.
Depthcharge
Admiral, we're in position. All ships are accounted for.
Demorian (Voice Over)
Proceed with the countdown. All groups assume
attack coordinates.
Depthcharge turns to his stupid copilot.
Depthcharge
Don't worry, my friends are down there.
They'll have those def bases down on time...(to
himself) or this'll be the shortest offensive of all time...
The copilot flips some switches and grunts an alien comment (BLAHBLAHBLAH).
Demoiran (VO)
All craft, prepare to jump to Light speed on 40:04:00.
Depthcharge
All right. Stand by.
He Press the 'J' Buttion, and the stars outside begin to streak.
We are treated to an awesome sight: first the Battle Dread,
then Demoiran's Elite Assault Dread, then, in large segments, the huge
fleet ROARS INTO FASTER THEN LIGHT SPEED. And disappears.
The Hive and its Sanctuary Moon hang distant in space as
the UGTO fleet comes out of FTL with an awesome roar. The
Assault Dessie and several UGTO fighters are at the front as
the space armada bears down on its target.
Depthcharge flips switches, checks his screen, and speaks into the
radio.
Depthcharge
All wings report in.
Starfist3
Red Leader standing by.
Lith Ragond
Gray Leader standing by.
Drakker
Green Leader standing by.
Depthcharge
Lock Weapons in attack positions.
From the bridge of the UGTO Headquarters Frigate, Admiral Demorian
watches the fighters massing outside his viewscreen.
Demorian: May the Balance be with us.
Depthcharge looks worriedly at his alien copilot, Josef, who points
to the control panel and talks to Depthcharge.
Depthcharge: We've got to be able to get some kind of a
reading on that shield, 199% or 100%! Well, how
could they be Dictoring us if they don't know
if we're coming?..
Depthcharge shoots a concerned look out at the approaching Hive as the implications of what he's just said sink in. He hits a switch on his comlink.
Depthcharge
Break off the attack! The Shield is still up!!
Starfist3 (VO)
I get no reading. Are you sure?
Depthcharge
Pull up! All craft pull up!
The Assault dessie turns hard to the left. The Battle dreads and the Frigates of Red Squad veer off desperately to avoid the unseen wall.
(scence: Admiral Demorian's cruiser, Base one)
Alarms are screaming and lights flashing as the huge ship changes
course abruptly. Other ships in the fleet shoot by outside as the
armada tries to halt its forward momentum.
Demorian
Take evasive action! Green Group, stick close to holding sector MV-7.
A UGTO n00b turns away from his screen and calls out to Demoiran, quite excited. The Admiral rushes over to the n00b.
n00b
Admiral, we have enemy ships in sector 47!!!!
On the screen can be seen the moon, The Hive, and the massive K'luth fleet. Demorian moves to the comlink.
Demorian
UNF!! It's a trap!!!!
Depthcharge (over comlink)
Fighters coming in.
There is much excitement on the bridge as the attack begins.
The Millennium Bird and several squads of UGTO fighters head
into an armada of ICC fighters. The sky explodes as a fierce
dogfight ensues in and around the giant UGTO cruisers.
Drakker
There's too many of them! We need Point defense!
Starfist3
PD won't do us good at this time!
Depthcharge
Accelerate to attack speed! Draw their fire
away from the cruisers.
Lith Ragond
Copy, Gold Leader.
(Scence: inside of a UGTO fighter it brings up it's targeting computer to see how many ICC crafts are coming...their whole sceen isf ull of blinking dots.)
(inside if ICC fighter cockpit)
Lead ICC fighter: All guns within range..........
FIRE!
(the heart stopping ending in part 4 of 4...)
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We Never finish anything. we practice and practice and never get it correct. We play it out how it is, then leave it, unfinshed. We move onto the next piece and repeat...
[ This Message was edited by: Fattierob (1A) -FP- on 2003-08-26 19:26 ]
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Sven
Cadet
Sundered Weimeriners
Joined: January 11, 2003
Posts: 278
From: Vancouver, Canada
| Posted: 2003-08-25 00:12
this is yummy! keep it up!
UNF!! Its a trap!!
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You dare plumb the depths of my mind? Welcome to Tomorrow's Yesterday!
Sven Viking: Dynamiting himself to pieces since 5/30/2003!
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Axianda The Royal
Fleet Admiral
Terra Squadron
Joined: November 20, 2001
Posts: 4273
From: Axianda
| Posted: 2003-08-25 07:48
Cue some blood splaters, screams, and other assroted items of unhapyness in background OMG how do you come up whit this ROFLMAO
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- Axi
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The Reaper
Cadet
Joined: December 09, 2002
Posts: 234
From: Eternity
| Posted: 2003-08-25 08:08
W00t! I've been included by accident!
Emporer> Very soon. the Dark Reaper Eater will be finished. and then we will rule the METAVERSE.....BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA...(he starts to cough uncontroably. but he stops some how.)...i need some medication...
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Lark of Serenity
Grand Admiral
Raven Warriors
Joined: June 02, 2002
Posts: 2516
| Posted: 2003-08-25 09:22
Larkys Short Story:
USS wambamthankyoumam approaches GefJon, the most loathed planet ever
Helm: uhhh... i think its broken again sir....
CO: I JUST FIXED IT AN HOUR AGO!!
(planet has ICC written across it in generators)
CO has seisure
(after CO recovers-)
ok, first land some troops on there
Helm yessir! (clunk sound as various drop pods release from craft, 5 of them miss intended target and fly off into space, hitting the gas giant. the other 3 land 50 miles away from anything important) (10 hours later...)
tactical: wooo, we capped it!
CO: ... just bomb the freakin generators
tact: okie dokie (tactical fires 6 bombs, 3 bombs miss, other 3 destroy one of the generators. the ship then waits for resupply so it can fire another 6 bombs)
CO: so why are u not cloud bombing?
tact: its against the rulez sir
CO: what rules?
tact holds up bombing manual
CO: oh dear lord... (CO has second seisure)
few moments later
tact: ... well thats the gen problem fixed
CO (having trouble breathing): what do you mean?
Helm: the planet was just roided sir, by that ICC scout over there sir
(ICC scout jumps away)
CO: ...
(3rd seizure)
CO (after recovering): ok, how do we fix this?
tact: well i-
CO: im talking to the science officer, fool!
tact: but i-
CO: NO!
tact: but but but, this is star trekish, so we could use the tachyon drive to fix whatevers wrong
CO: .... thats rediculess
Science Officer: actually....
CO blinks, shoots science officer
Science Officer: OW
CO: alrighty, turn her around and rev up the tachyon drive, Mr. Tuvok, do whatever you need to do to the thingy to make it do the stuff with the other thing
Tact: yessir
(few moments later, tachyon beam strikes gefjon, instantly building it back up again. warning lights go off thruout the ship)
Science O: sir, were detecting a quantum singularity, a spacial rift, a fixed spacial rift, a shrunken quantum singularity, an anti time thingy, a-
CO: well its not like the planets any worse off then is it?
Science O: not really sir....
CO: good, lets go do this to Luna and see if it helps any
tact: well have to use the sublight drives to get there sir
CO: ... why?
tact: cause we no longer have a tachyon drive, just the tachyon beam
CO: ....
(seisure #4)
(cue funky star trek music, and then an explosion as the ship, piloted by a kluth, runs into the gas giant)
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Admiral Larky, The Wolf
Don't play with fire, play with Larky.
Raven Division Command - 1st Division
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Darksworde
Marshal
Pitch Black
Joined: September 06, 2002
Posts: 806
From: The Zoo
| Posted: 2003-08-25 11:29
um lark. Interesting story
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SabelTooth
Cadet
Joined: March 16, 2002
Posts: 340
From: The Netherlands
| Posted: 2003-08-25 13:13
LOOOOL i need more!!
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Fattierob
Vice Admiral
Joined: April 25, 2003
Posts: 4059
| Posted: 2003-08-26 19:20
lark. don't steal me fans 
hmm Darkspace: Phantom Newbie?
hmmmmmmm...how many people would want to hear a story about news FFing each other and building pklanets with 31 fusion generators and a colony base?...interesting idea, though.....
where do i come up with it all?
you must be insanse to write like one. heh, heh, heh
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